THE WHITE PICKET FENCE

Happy fall everyone….hope you are enjoying my blog.. I for sure am lovin it and all your feedback.. sooooooooooo….did YOU dream about your knight in shining armor? Did YOU have a vision for your future even as a young girl? Did it turn out the way planned? Tell me more.. I just love reminiscing!!!!

I believed it was every girl’s dream to be happily married, live in the cottage with the white picket fence, and have lots of babies with which to cuddle and coo. You know, like the Sound of Music–everyday a play-day filled with adventure and oodles and oodles of fun with Mama and Papa.

You’re probably thinking: What planet is she from? Call it a delusion, perhaps a psychotic episode, but that’s my “perfect family” fantasy. The never-ending dreamer–that’s me!

Todd and I talk about having kiddos alright. He’s twenty, I’m twenty-three when we get hitched, and we both think waiting five years is the best route to go. Somehow we get the sequencing backwards… never liked math anyway… and only two weeks into the marriage I find myself nauseous, dog tired, and a wee bit cantakerous. Can’t keep down a stitch of food. Holy smokes, Pat is pregnant! So much for the honeymoon! So much for our plan…..

Nine months later, Colleen arrives. I think I am ready… boy oh boy am I in for a rude awakening. I give Colleen her three a.m. feeding our first night home. This is simple–piece of cake! With that, as if on cue, Colleen lets out a huge burp and vomits her entire feeding down my back and all over the mahoganey rocking chair. Simultaneously, she soaks my nightgown with urine and , just for good measure, smelly brown poop. She’d let go from every orifice possible. Welcome to motherhood!

And this was only the beginning.. with so much more to come…but I’m not gonna let the cat out of the hat completely.. not just yet anyway!!! It will all come out in the book.. so sit tight!!!

I know this will jar some memories for y’all, as sometimes it feels like yesterday!!!!! Fill me in.. can’t wait

© Patricia Bateson 2017
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